Within the last 2 years of my life, I have successfully:
- Bombed the only test I spent 4 months studying for. Thus, causing complete annihilation to my hopes and dreams of one day becoming a child advocacy attorney - it was probably for the best.
- Graduated from a
universitysub-par state school with a BA in PR - which really means, I get to pay the state back for a degree in "professional bullshitism."
- Landed a sweeeet J-O-B (salary + full-benefits = facilitate alcohol dependence)
- Ruined any viable relationship with a member of the opposite sex and as a result gained back my virginity...
- AND acquired a strong taste (some may argue obsession...or problem?) for bourbon, scotch, and lager...I will frequently refer to these as: "whiskey&brews" or "the brown's."
All in all, I must admit I've learned a lot about myself and that my mishaps and vice's have led me to who and what I am today...
... a BAR aficionado ... (ə-ˌfi-sh(ē-)ə-ˈnä-(ˌ)dō, -fē-, -sē-ə-) 1. somebody who is enthusiastic and knowledgeable about something....and in this case, that something is the overall culture of bars (pubs, saloons, dives, brothels, etc.)
Culture of bars - People, men and women, 21 years of age or older (usually) go to a bar to essentially drink (get shit hammed) and meet other people (who are shit hammed) to interact with (try to get it in) and build relationships. Hence, the simplification to three words; dives (bars), drinks (alcoholic beverages), and dudes (those who constantly try to get it in). *shit hammed - a combination of the two frequently used terms to describe being extremely intoxicated, "shitfaced" and "hammered."
So, in the last 2 years I accomplished the non-goals as stated above, developed a passion for drinking, and not only grasped the concept of "bar culture," but also managed to learn much about what constitutes a good bar and a bad bar.
In this review, I will provide a brief overview, as well as a synopsis of my experience, and convey the good vs. bad criterion of the bar.
The criterion:
- Bartenders/Service
- Regulars/Crowd Type
- Male:Female Ratio
- Cuisine
- Music Selection
- Decor and Structural Design
- History
- Location
- Prices
- and most importantly...the quality of "the brown's" (whiskey&brew selection)
I will also exhibit the array of souvenirs I leave with/wake up to find buried in my purse (e.g., bar notes, bar tabs, text messages/bbm's, mobile uploads, etc.)
I hope that my encounters with dives, drinks, and dudes will motivate people to get out there and experience the culture of bars for themselves. There's lots of liquor to drink and crazies to meet.
Well, that's that.
Nice to meet you and be good,
TBR